Crazy dreams

Oh my gosh, I just had a crazy dream, and I'm here to write it down, because hand writing wasn't fast enough and I may lose it.  I was in my house at night and I could hear there were others in the house, but I wasn't alarmed, because in the dream I had a roommate.  I was in the bathroom washing my face and getting ready for bed, when a fellow I know from long ago walked into the bathroom and started talking to me as if he did that every day.  His name is John.  About five minutes later, David walked in behind him and also started chatting.  These are people that I know in real life.  The roommate I don't know in real life, she was some blond girl.  David approached me and started acting as familiar towards me as he had when we dated for three years and then lived together for ten years (thirteen years go).  Isn't that odd?  We were together a total of 13 years and I'm unintentionally dreaming of him 13 years later.  Over these last 13 years, I have rarely dreamed of him.  I was a little taken aback by his forward behavior in last night's dream, but I could feel the love and the comfort of familiarity, so I didn't throw either him or John out of my dream or my house.  It just seemed normal that they were there in my dream, even though either of them in my house today (let alone both of them in my house today) could only mean that there had been an Act of God at play.  I don't use that phrase lightly.  It's literal and very much a part of the reason we apparently parted ways.  But, back to the dream lest I forget.  I finished getting ready for bed and went to bed in the room that David and I used to share when he lived with me.  That's odd that I naturally went to that room, because I haven't slept there in real life in almost 13 years.  That sounds crazy doesn't it?  Well it isn't really.  I decided to redo the bedroom, and it took me a little while to get it done, and an even longer time to refurnish it, and I got used to sleeping in the other bedroom so that's where I've been sleeping ever since.  I can't help but tell myself all these asides, because I think it's odd that my subconscious puts people where it thinks they belong.  So, in the dream, David follows me into the bedroom and gets into bed with me like it was nothing but normal.  He cuddles up to me and starts kissing the back of my neck and telling me how much he missed me and that he had never stopped loving me.  He then asked me what I had been taking.  I was like ... "what?"   He said, "Did you take a pill of some kind, because I tasted something like medicine on your skin."  He then went on to tell me what I should or should not eat, drink or do in life.  I said, "Look I haven't taken anything today, this week and maybe not this month.  If I did this month, it would have been an Advil."  He said, "You really should not even take Advil ... " and went on further to preach about the dangers of all medication.  I said, "Look, if you are going to channel John's crazy life ideas again, you really should save your energy and find someone else to preach to."  I left the bed and went into the kitchen and he followed me ... my roommate was up turning on random lights here and there.  I mentioned to her that John was sleeping on the sofa and that she might disturb him with the lights on and off.  She apologized and turned the light off.  I was about to get some water out of the fridge and happened to look out of the huge window that looks over the backyard.  What I saw out in the dark surprised me ... and I exclaimed to David, "Look, look out there."  He did and saw what I saw ... under the light of the full moon we could see the three female figures all dressed in long flowing black gowns cutting across my yard from one next door neighbor's yard over to the next.  The women stood out mostly because they were dressed in black and each had identical masks on.  White glowing masks.  They kept going across the yard ... sort of floating as they went.  I thought all of this was getting a little too weird, but I went back to bed and David followed ... leaving off with his lectures about everything under the sun that I wasn't doing right in life.  The next morning I woke up very early and thought I would go out for a walk on what would normally be a very busy street, but there was relatively no traffic, which I thought odd.  About that time, I looked back and realized some sort of animal had jumped from the bridge down to the road below.  I couldn't tell what it was, but the animal was large enough to make me think RUN.  I decided to quickly exit the road and head toward my next door neighbor's house.  I knocked on her door and she answered it about the time the animal came around the corner.  It looked like a big cat ... like a tiger, but not a tiger.  She let me in and it turns out that my dream land next door neighbor is my real life friend Debbie and her husband Steve.  I told Debbie and Steve about the wild cat and Steve decided to call animal control.  I then told them about the three women who had been dressed in black and glowing white masks during the night.  I was also in the middle of telling them about David showing up at the house .... and that's when the dream ended, and I woke up way earlier than I would most days of my life.  

I'm trying to decide how I feel about this dream, and I'm definitely wondering why I dreamed about all of these people from my waking life.  That's rare isn't it?  That we dream of that many people that we really know?   

Eenie Meenie Miney Mo ...

I put a call into my very own personal life counselor who is more often known as my mother, but she chose not to choose for me.  She told me to flip a coin, if I could not make my own decision.  The thing about flipping coins so they say (yes those they) is that you already know deep down in your gut what you most want to do and will therefore be rooting for a certain side of the coin to land face side up. I guess that takes all the guesswork out of a choice.  However, as we know, one's brain has a tendency to debate one's gut when faced with two fantastic choices and that's where I'm at.  My brain is duking it out with my gut.

The decision in question is whether I should accept an invitation to the Gulf of Mexico for the 4th of July holiday with friends or accept an invitation to hang out with friends in Atlanta that same weekend.  I was going to put this up for vote on my facebook page, but both of these sweet friends are on my facebook page, and I don't want to make one feel like I would choose one over the other, because I truly wouldn't.  That's why this decision is so difficult for me.  I love both of my friends and I love spending time with each of them for very different reasons.  One is laid back and the other is a mover and a shaker.  There will either be no weariness or there will be no rest for the weary.  So, do I want to relax for a few days, or do I want to be on the constant go?  And, there is this one other thing ... traffic.  I hate Atlanta traffic, but I love the relaxing drive to the Gulf Coast.  And, there is the fact that I was just at the beach for a full week early June, and I've been dating someone who lives at another beach location just an hour's drive from where I've recently been invited, so I've been to the coast more than my fair share over the last six months.  As for Atlanta, it's been a while.  Maybe last fall since I've been there.  There are so many different things to do in Atlanta, which I love, but I also love what the beach offers -- lots of down time.  Can you see now why I've resorted to calling on people to help me decide.  I want to be in both places at the same time and I'm having problems organizing my pro and con list.  It may not seem like it, but I'm leaning towards Atlanta just because it's more of the unknown itinerary, and what was it that my last post said ... we all need to get out of our routines.  I definitely go to the sea more than I go to the bigger city.  And that's by choice, so it must be where I'm most happy.  Shouldn't I go where I'm most happy?  Or should I go where  there will be an element of surprise?  

What will y'all do to exercise your freedom of choice this Independence Day? 

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Is luck really luck?

I believe in certain circumstances of luck (or the lack thereof), but I tend to believe that one mostly makes his or her own luck, and an article that I read this week continues that belief.  The article stated that "lucky" people expect the best and that they notice what others miss.  In effect, lucky people are more open to random opportunities than are supposedly unlucky people.  What about you?  Are you a person who looks only for what you expect to see?  If so, don't think you are by yourself in that personality trait.  I'm so there with you.  I'm such an innie, that I'm practically blind to my external world.  If you are so focused on what you are expecting to see around you, join me in loosening the death grip on a narrow view of reality.  Be more flexible and laid back in life.  Most importantly, open yourself up to a fortunate circumstance.  Lucky people say YES more often than do unlucky people.  Now, don't go crazy with that or use it as a permission slip to crazy town, but simply imagine what would happen if you allowed yourself to embrace fear, uncertainty and discomfort .  Be more vulnerable to the world around you and it will love you for it.  I'm not telling you to throw good sense and caution to the wind.  I'm encouraging you to use your instincts in the name of self love.  Go forth and meet a good vibe stranger and make him or her a friend.  Having lots of people connections will up the opportunity ante.  Of course, if you go to the same places, use the same routes to and fro your destinations, shop the same old stores, eat at the same restaurants -- well you get the picture.  You are in a rut man, and if you stay in your rut, you will mostly encounter the same of what you already have.  And if that's good enough for you, then hey, you may have actually reached nirvana.  For those who would like more opportunities and good fortune in life, just remember that confidence goes a long way in determining your own fate, as does your ability to learn from failure.  Instead of harping on the negativity of failure, remember that failure is the breeding ground of success!  And, remember that good fortune comes in many forms.  Look for luck in the most obvious places ... those places that you can't see for seeing them.  Look for them in a smile, a hug, a rainbow, a person, an animal, a country, a publisher's clearing house drawing, or even a breath of fresh air.  Even the smallest bit of good fortune goes a long way in an otherwise ordinary day and I wouldn't want either you or I to miss out on all the good life has to offer.

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This is what freedom feels like ... and I like it.

I'm writing from a place with a picture postcard view ... thanks to one of the sweetest girls I've ever known.  I would take a photo and send you a picture, but you are likely still in possession of the imagination God was good enough to give you at birth, and I have previously posted pictures of my vacation location somewhere on this blog for your viewing pleasure.  Before me is an expanse of blue skies, white puffy clouds, an ocean sparkling blue, white sand, a pair of seagulls, a dragonfly, colorful umbrellas, a few palm trees, and a bit of undulating picket fence left in its natural wood state to both compliment and protect precious dunes.  The waves are rushing to the shore, a gull is calling another, the sound of a sea breeze is blowing past my ears, I hear someone washing sand off of their feet from the outside spigot, a page is being turned (gasp) in a "real book" being happily read and ice is clinking with joy.  It's a fine week to be at the beach.  Oh wait, I hear something calling my name ... why it's a BBQ sandwich and I'm late for lunch ... but then, I'm sorta on island time, so its never too late for lunch when you have days to spend exactly as you wish.

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Can you dig it?

I showed up here today to snoop on my own blog.  I've been digging out grass that has gotten into my shrub bed.  I also dug up two shrubs (Emerald Snow Lorapetalum) which I am going to replace with two Purple Diamond Compact Lorapetalum and I needed to remind myself of the shape that my shrub bed was originally in once the landscaper came a few years ago and I remember posting pictures somewhere on this blog.  I've been very neglectful keeping up with the line of my shrub borders.  Anyways, the shrubs I'm digging out and the shrubs I am planting are both Southern Living varieties -- either cultivated by Southern Living or sold under their name -- I was enticed by the compact nature and color of these plants, not by the Southern Living brand, even though y'all know I'm all about some southern living, because hey, I was born here and my family keeps my heart chained to this humid, mosquito infested region of our great country.  It's only 9:44 a.m. on this fine rather cool by southern standards Saturday morning and I've already sweated at least one bucket of moisture from the top of my head.  I'm not a pretty sight at the moment.  My hair is flat on my head and I have black dirt smeared here and there.  It's beautiful dirt mind you, but its dirt just the same.  My yard is at least 80 years in the making, and someone got a good head start on creating the perfect dirt for nearly everything that will grow in the southern sun.  Even the worms love my dirt.  I don't mind them, but I can't keep up with the Virginia Creeper, Smilax and Florida Betony which are the bane of my garden existence.  

I think I'm procrastinating.  I still have work to do before the sun hits the spot I'm working in, so I guess I better find those photos I came here to find and get back out there. 

I hope y'all are having more fun on this fine Memorial Day Weekend than I am!

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There's fun elsewhere, but there's no place like home.

Want to appreciate your own home?  Visit a friend who doesn't live in a very cozy home.

Want your guests to feel comfortable in your home?   Give them a bedside table to place their personal small belongings.  Give them something or somewhere to place their luggage instead of the floor.  Give them someplace to hang a wet towel. Those are the things I missed when I was in Atlanta this weekend visiting a friend.

Even though I was glad to come home to my cozy home, I actually had a great time!  We went shopping, we dined out, we went to Mary's http://marysatlanta.com/ for Karaoke Saturday evening (a fabulous time was had by all -- those gay people really know had to make you feel welcome), we went for a light hike in what I think is the Chattahoochee River National Recreation Area http://www.nps.gov/chat/planyourvisit/islandford.htm

That would have been a great light hike, if my friend and I had not just eaten lunch.  I suggested we wait until after hiking to eat, but she's a eater, so we ate first.  I think I could have appreciated our surroundings better if I wasn't so aware of being full.  Hate to be so suggestive, but next time, I'm calling the shots.  


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Annoyance 058

Having to fight fleas even though I own no pets!  Damn those vermin!!!!! 






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