Almost became a veggie while watching other people cook veggies

Its Sunday. I overslept, so I watched church on TV instead of partaking in my usual hit and run to Sunday School. Yeah, I'm slightly rebellious. I usually skip "big" church, because I'm not a fan of the usual church rituals such as -- meeting and greeting "pew neighbors" most of whom I don't know and likely never will, singing the same songs over and over (the Church got a new music minister and he's a bit of a downer), and the less than savory alter call usually laden with suspect and guilt. Well, you get the picture. Lest you think I'm totally anti church, I would remind you that I enjoy Sunday School. Why? Because I actually enjoy connecting with God in a less "ritualistic" setting, and one particular Sunday School teacher and class suits my "less ritual" mentality.

After watching "church" TV [they were preaching on sexual immorality ... and although I sometimes participate in sexual immorality (fornication -- not adultery), I remain in denial that God was talking to me], I watched The Sunday Morning Show (my favorite segment was the one about Colin Firth -- he seems so humble and I like that about actors), then I flipped over to FOOD TV to watch people cook things that I wish they would share with me. My brain suddenly felt like an overcooked vegetable. Too much TV is apparently bad for you, even if it is "good" for you TV.

So, I hauled my vegetated brain and numb arse off the sofa, headed for the gym, and GOT ANOTHER STICKER for my effort YEAH!!!! I am going to round out this month with more stickers than last month, but from the looks of things, I could stand some improvement. I'm going back for a Zumba class at 4:00. First time Zumba-ing for me ... I will let you know what the hell that is and if I survived ... to the end of class. ONE MORE STICKER for this month! Yeah! I'm going to go ahead and give it to myself because I know I'm going, and I want you to see how many dates I have had with ET this month. Have a look see ....



Not enough, but better than NONE!

And the blah blah blah goes on .....

I'm home from Zumba, a dance/exercise class with a bent towards salsa! It was great fun. I am a slight perfectionist, and I am driven to master those moves! So, back I go next week ...

Photos taken at Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC

This is the "lawn" and fountain wall that is beyond the front lawn of The Biltmore House and quite the view from inside the house. My friend Amanda is on the top of that wall taking photo of my friend Ebony and me.

The next photo is the one Amanda took from the wall. We are waiting for her to come down, so we can take our tour.

This is Ebony and me up close and personal. I love her fuchsia sweater! She looks sweet, I look like a motorcycle rider.

This is a view of the Biltmore House located on 125,000 acres in Asheville, North Carolina.

This is a view of their back yard! Seriously! I'm guessing most of what you can see belongs to this estate because 125,000 acres is a lot of acres (and it looked very well kept).

Not fishing -- just observing

I have read some mighty stellar blogs on this site, and I feel nothing but out of my league around here. Lots of you people should be paid, I should be chased out of town.



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Evil chases me in the wee hours

I swear. No, really, I swear I do swear. I swear like a fiend sometimes even though I try not to. If provoked, I sometimes even swear in print. However, I try not to swear in print, and find it easier not to swear in print than I do when I'm speaking. I'm not sanctimonious about not swearing in print, I love reading your swear words. I swear I do. It tells me you are real and grounded in who you are. Besides, I know that swear words aren't bad or worse than the want to swear. And, I really want to swear, so why torment myself?

My self tormenting stems only from years of conditioning in the "professional" world. I have been so proper "writing" conditioned that it even takes great effort for me to write email or blogs using contractions such as -- isn't, aren't, can't. Or my favorite horrific southern baddie ... ain't. And you can bet your bottom dollar that I use "ain't" like nobody's business when speaking. I cannot help it. I have been verbally conditioned to speak as badly as I have been conditioned to write properly. Not saying I write 100% properly. I am definitely afflicted with a plethora of writing issues. I have people for that though. People who will edit my errors.

All that to say ... WHAT THE HELL?!? I unintentially fell asleep around 8:00 p.m. last night and was NOT surprised to find myself awake by 1:30 a.m. Not just awake, WIDE AWAKE. I was trying desperately to go back to sleep, but my mind kept rolling. I hate those wee morning hour thoughts. They are evil, and I have yet to understand why they wish to torment me. All they say over and over and over is ...

"You are alone. Listen how quiet it is. See, we told you that you would be alone. You keep trying to say that you aren't alone, but you are alone, alone, right by yourself and all the people that you know can't keep you from being alone. You are always going to be alone."

Of course I'm paraphrasing, but that's the gist of those wee hour thoughts. No matter what, if I wake up anywhere between 1:30 and 5:00 a.m., those thoughts plague me worse than frizz on a humid day. I hate them. I am afraid of them, they scare the beejeebees out of me. I argue with them. I try to block them out with other thoughts. I try to pray them away. I finally end up trying to drown them out by watching TV, reading while taking a hot bath, anything which will distract me from their evil quest. I am finally able to shun them, but not before their insidious chant, and all of my diversionary tactics, have kept me awake for a good hour and usually more. I need less distracting diversionary tactics.

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Surely the only highlight of my day

Oh wait, that should probably read, "Surely the only highlight of his day." So, my XXB (aka my ex ex boyfriend) invited me to lunch today, and I said yes. No, my heart did not flutter in the least when he invited me, nor did it flutter when I saw him, nor did it flutter when he hugged me. He did smell nice, but that didn't make my heart flutter either. All signs to reiterate my own knowing that I truly am over this toddler. I say this because he is 9 years younger than me. And, you can stop right there in your judgmental tracks. I am no prowling animal and I hate when people suggest that women are hunting down men younger to lure into their dating world. I didn't hunt the XXB down, I didn't ask him to dance, or ask him out. He asked me to dance. I said no. He asked again. I said no. He asked again, I said yes. He asked for my number. I said no. He asked again, I said no, but I will take your number. I didn't call him, but a few days later I saw him elsewhere, and he kept looking at me with those beseeching eyes, and I finally gave him a call. From across the room. Ha ha. We thereafter dated for almost a year before our "romance" crashed and burned. It was another year before we spoke again, and we have been friends ever since.

At lunch, we talked about this and that. He is still lamenting that girl who broke up with him by text. Honestly, I believe the XXB has been shot by that sneaky little cuss -- Cupid. I refuse to extract his love arrow. I think a little unrequited love will be good for the XXB's soul. Not only that, but I think the current object of his desire may be swayed by his gentle and flattering persistence. I was, and I don't regret being swayed. I got what looks like a long term friend out of it :)


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Residual Lament

Oh, life is so good, I have everything I could possibly ever need, except for ... TWO AND ONE-HALF (2.5) (2 1/2) (3-0.5) (1+1.5) MORE INCHES OF HAIR!!!!!!!

P.S. For all you math nerds, that string of numbers is not an algebraic equation, it's a string of ire.

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I couldn't keep you, and that sucks.

It isn't easy parting ways with people that you love, but sometimes it's the only way forward. Wouldn't it be nice if there were a better way to let go, besides heart ripping pain? Wouldn't it be nice if we could just "remove" people from our lives as easily as we remove facebook friends we no longer want on our page? Some people have no trouble pushing the real life disconnect button, but I'm still looking for it. The danger of love for me is that my heart wishes to keep loving people I have grown to love. Granted, it's sometimes hard to recognize the feeling as love, because at times the feeling feels like hate. But, I know full well what that means. It means, I love something so intensely that it spurs me to feel the complete opposite of love, if I am deprived of it. Even, if I was equally responsible for depriving myself of it.

I am NOT searching for the "real life disconnect" button in order to disconnect from any one person, I simply wish to disconnect from the intense feelings I hold for certain people, so that it doesn't hurt when I think of them, talk to them or see them. I want to continuously love those people that I love but can't keep. Not with the same kind of love, but a less selfish love. So, I endure the heart ripping consequence of daring to love, while proudly wearing my lingering distress as a badge of honor. My heart was brave, and it will be brave again!



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NOT SO DEEP THOUGHT OF THE DAY

We really should have eyes in the back of our head. I think having eyes in the back of our head, would save us from scaring the hell out of ourselves. Especially, if we forget we are naked, stand with our back to a full length mirror and simultaneously hold up a hand mirror to see if the back of our hair is doing what it is supposed to do. I found out that the back of my hair is the least of my problems. I think I have traumatized myself!

Great, just great ... now I'm gonna have to make up with -- ET -- aka the elliptical trainer. I really dislike spending time with ET (he's sooooo annoyingly tiresome), but I realize that little bugger is right, he, not KRISPY KREME, is the answer to my prayer.

So, you are saying to yourself right about now ... "Hmmm, how would having eyes in the back of our heads help us NOT scare the hell out of ourselves, and if we could scare the hell out of ourselves, wouldn't that be okay?" I can only answer the first part of that wonderment ... but I won't, I will leave you to ponder those thoughts a little deeper for yourselves.

P.S. If any of my commas hurt your eyes, you now know I have a love/hate with commas, I love them so much, I put them anywhere that I think they are needed or look good.


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SUPER PISSED ANNOYANCE 029

ARRRGGH ... I was reminded at lunch why I rarely get my hair cut!!!!!!!! That DAMN girl NEVER LISTENS TO ME. When I say I don't want my hair too short, and too short means anything above my shoulder, I FREAKING MEAN IT! THAT'S IT, there will be no more chances for that girl to touch one hair on my head. From now on, I'm going for the "COUSIN IT" look!!!! Can you tell I'm mad yet???????

I'M TOTALLY PISSED!!!!

I should have learned my lesson when she last curled my hair and sent me out of there looking like a Shirley Temple wanna be! Noooooo, I simply went home (ON MY FREAKING LUNCH HOUR) and washed it and styled it again! Time cured that wound, but it will not cure this one!

I'M MAD, I AM MADDER THAN MAD!!!! Seriously, I want to punch something. I am soooooo mad.


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Annoyance 028

Say to me, "We need to do this or that." When what you really mean is "I" need to do this or that.

I realize that you believe you are encouraging team building, but I've been on to your psychological ploy for some time now, and I'm calling bullshit on it.



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Eli's coming ...

This is Eli ... he is my only "pet."

... what's up Eli?

Seriously dude, you need to stop drinking so much.

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The Night The Lights Went Out in Georgia

I was sitting in a mighty dark house for three long hours last night. Thankfully, I found these leftover luminary Christmas candles, more time to reflect on my nasty PMS attitude, and time to beseech God for his assistance in being a better me ...

Gimme a break, I had to do something with 3 hours of mind numbing and patience crushing time.


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Cause for celebration?

This was supposed to be my 100th blog post, but I got ahead of myself and posted others. Anyways, I thought in celebration of that silly and insignificant 100 blog post milestone, that I would post a "bucket list" post, but that didn't go so well. I couldn't get past ten. So, here is a list of 100 things about me. I thought it would help you to know that I consist of more than my IRE which consistently careens into inconsideration, obnoxiousness, disrespect, and other undesirable behaviors in others. Ready? Here goes:

500 Days of Summer

"Now, I think you are just remembering the good stuff. Next time you look back, I uh really think you should look again."
500 Days of Summer


When the Universe speaks to me, I listen. Thanks for the reminder Universe. I love you for loving me.


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All My Days

All My Days -- Alexi Murdoch
(off the soundtrack -- Away We Go)

Well I have been searching all of my days
All of my days
Many a road, you know
I've been walking on
All of my days
And I've been trying to find
What's been in my mind
As the days keep turning into night

I'm in love ...

I'm in love with the latest man in my life ... my potential landscaper Jarrod.

I just love a man who knows what the hell he is talking about and sees your vision. I loved it when Jarrod said, "No, you aren't telling me too much, I love when people have a clear vision of what they want." I loved it that he seemed excited about taking on the task of turning my vision into a reality. I loved that Jarrod identified the banes of my yard existence merely by taking stock of his surroundings. He also knew the proper name of my weed from hell! That's always a good sign! I loved that Jarrod was articulate, friendly, laid back, and that when he was running five minutes late, he called to let me know he would be running five minutes late. I love a man who keeps his word!!!!!!!

None of that means I "want him" in the sense of "wanting him." I just loved all the things about him as my potential landscaper, and I am excited about seeing him next week because I cannot wait to see what ideas he brings to the picnic table :)


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Two sentences just for you.

(I deleted the first sentence.)

(I also deleted the second sentence.)

You should have gotten here sooner. I was really pissed and you missed the thing you most loved about me. RANTING AND RAVING.

Stymied!

I have been reading (and re-reading) a book titled "Create Your Best Life." It's a remarkably good book in my opinion, not your normal self-help fare. It is filled with lots of sociological and psychological studies, examples, etc. on what makes people behave the way they do. Goal setting and accomplishing those goals are apparently the golden keys to creating your best life.

I have met most all of my life goals, at least those that are within my control. I am now trying to find another 100 meaningful goals in order to complete the worksheet in this book. I thought that would be a good mile marker for my 100th blog post (which I have now passed).

So far, I'm at a loss beyond the following items, and I'm not certain they are especially meaningful, but I guess as long as they are semi meaningful to me, they are meaningful enough:

1) Figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life;
2) So that I can go back to college (finance? something green? psychology?);
3) Learn formal dance (salsa, swing, shag, etc.);
4) Take an etiquette class (I could use a little polishing around the edges);
5) Learn to shoot (you better learn to duck);
6) Learn to boat (is that a problem for a non swimmer?);
7) Learn to prepare a really awesome pasta dish (got any recipe suggestions?);
8) Forgive all the ex-boyfriends (that's an ongoing process);
9) Finish my bedroom remodeling project.
10) Turn my postage stamp of a front yard into a shimmering green jewel box (going to meet with the "jeweler" at lunch).

I couldn't think past ten goals, let alone reach 100! Got any good ideas of your own that you could share with me?? I don't need any travel suggestions, I don't love to travel, but I make myself travel in order to expand my horizons.

Bugger on this process, I guess I will have to write one of those "100 things about me" blog posts to mark the occasion.


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Simple Pleasure 008

Being invited and accepting the invite to lunch with my brother.

Lately, I have been experiencing a very heightened sense of love when spending time with my family members. The feeling of being loved and also liked for the person I am, not just because we are related, is very evident to me. They love me, they really love me. But better than that, they like me, they really like me.


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Self Annoyance 001

Turning my car into a bumper car. Arrrrrggggghhhh!

Scene of minor accident: Road to work.
Time of accident: Just before work.
Level of self discontent: 100%

I have NEVER been responsible for hitting another car with my car. Guess there really is a first time for everything.


Turn signal >
I passed the 100 blog post mark and am working on creating a mile marker for the occasion. Maybe I will get that done sooner rather than later.

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Annoyance 026, and GREAT Pleasure 001 & 102

Annoyance of the day:

DETOURS, they suck a chunk of pleasure out of any trip! A boulder slammed a portion of an Interstate which was the most direct path to our destination. I hate when that happens!


GREAT pleasures of the day:

001 Boulder did not slam into us or any other motorist.

002 Touring the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, Tennessee. If you haven't seen it, you should. It's an architectural masterpiece covering 4 acres, and a grand garden/forest masterpiece set on 125,000 acres of rolling Tennessee hills.


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Simple pleasure 007?

I love that series of numbers -- 007 -- for the obvious reason.

But, my simple pleasure for the day is:

Having a bit of lunch time fun with my mom and my uncle who is visiting from the great state of Mississippi. We took photos, and that led to fits of chuckles. Ummm ... Mother, what happened to my head in that shot? I could have sworn I had a head.


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Annoyance 025

People telling me that I think too much. My response? "Take your one thought and stick it where the sun don't shine."


Grammatical note: Error on purpose. Don't be a grammar nazi.


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PMS, and when men should hide.

I'm talking to you men. PMS is not your fault, but it's not our fault either. You may not intend to hurt our feelings or make us mad, but you likely will, and you won't immediately comprehend what the hell happened. All you will know is that the person you thought you cared about, and who you thought cared about you, HATES YOU with a burning passion. Well not really you, just the very ground you dare walk upon, the air you breathe, your simple request to pass the salt, the blink of your eye, any involuntary muscle twitch or sigh, well, you get the picture. Some women, and I hope only few for you, will experience a very temporary loss of any sane reasoning. They will snap in the blink of the eye. No stressor is mundane, and you are no longer safe!

There is nothing for you to do, except keep your own personal calendar. If you don't know how to do this, and you have any "meaningful" woman in your life (co-worker, friend, family member, spouse, girlfriend, etc.), I suggest you google the process. Yes, it may be slightly embarrassing for you to ask your fair woman probing yet necessary questions, but making a calendar is your only hope. Then, and only then, will you come to expect the burning look in her eyes that signals trouble. Your next step ... HIDE!

Hide, but don't give up hope! Your fair creature is only temporarily possessed. She will soon be contrite and extra loving.



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Dream it ... and make it go away

Last night, I had two dreams, and in both I was irate. Imagine that, me irate! Is it just me, or is a clear personality issue rearing its ugly head? Don't get all sanctimonious on me for Pete's sake. Instead, get busy recognizing that anger has a necessary, good and often productive place in this universe.

So anyways, I believe last night's dreams were manifestations of my yesterday wherein I first had to corral a non literal herd of cats, tangle with a mama's boy ego, and be smacked in the head by facebook. That facebook smack was likely the cause of the mama's boy interaction gone bad, but who can really know, they were all annoying works of relation.

Imagine dreaming that you are sleeping and being woken by the sound of voices, power tools, scrapers, etc. Being the curious homeowner and good neighbor that I usually am, I got up in my dream to go see what all the ruckus was about. Imagine my shock, when I realized a crew of guys were working on my house totally unsolicited. I ran outside and started screaming for them to stop. Having reached the edge of my yard, I looked back at my house in horror. They were painting my roof (HOT PINK), scraping away my very recent and existing paint job on the house's trim, and they were cutting away a corner of my house. The word livid does not do justice to what I was feeling. Smoke was coming out of my ears, and I wanted to physically hurt them, all of them. As they scattered like rodents under the verbiage of my wrath, only a thin veil of sanity inhabited my body. Instead of choking those men with my bare hands, I snapped their sunglasses which were laid about. Oh yeah, all of them, not just the expensive looking ones. SNAP! I believe I may have watched one too many episodes of HGTV's Curb Appeal (Block Party), and I have only watched one!

My second dream was of the EXB. Let's just say I was not, and am not happy with him, and I expressed my very real anger non judiciously in my dream. This dream is less vivid than the first, but I do remember screaming the words ... "YOU NEED TREATMENT!!!."

In the light of day, I realize I may be the one who needs treatment. The silent treatment.

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Simple Pleasure 006

The deep south is no stranger to a few days of really cold weather in winter, but the deep freeze has set up camp in our backyard, and is overstaying its welcome. As southerners, we have long since acquired the skills needed to withstand melting like chocolate bars on our sidewalks under the burning gaze of a hot ball of fire mixed with wicked humidity, but we are nothing less than a bunch of sissies when it comes to cold.

Although I am desperately awaiting the return of chilly temps without bone chilling properties, it is my nature to "eventually" look for a positive in the negative. Of course, finding positives wasn't my first inclination. You know how I'm prone to bitching, wailing and gnashing of teeth. However, January is slipping away, and I feel as if I haven't given my pleasure seeking mission a fighting chance. So, here are three positives I could find about being submerged in a deep freeze:

1) I've been freezing my ass off! Whoo hooo! A real bonus which cuts back on the need for gym time!!

2) Cuddle time is more popular during really cold weather, and you know what that leads to right? Okay, not for me, because I am currently without a cuddle bud, but all that extra cuddling could be a real boon for the country -- more babies to fund that new health care plan! Now we can stop worrying about who is going to pay for it. WHOOOOOOO HOOOO!

3) Our extended freeze will hopefully kill lots of mosquitoes and fleas. Less chance of catching Malaria, West Nile virus, Dengue Fever, Septicemia and Bubonic plague is always high on my list of things to celebrate. If you aren't sick with Dengue, you can happily shake what the good Lord gave ya while dancing the Merengue!

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Annoyance 024

Hijacking my proposal!!! I invited you to meet me half way. You, true to form, WANT IT YOUR WAY! I am not BURGER KING! But, it looks as if I will be driving 7 hours to see you, because you are a gansta, and I am easy going and accommodating after I get over being royally annoyed!



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The news gets flashier

The ex ex boyfriend's girlfriend broke up with him via text message. He is nothing less than indignant of such cowardly behavior which he classifies as NOT CLASSY. I refrained from bringing up any less than classy behavior he may have been guilty of in the past and offered up a healthy dose of indignant remarks on his behalf. I am the best ex ex girlfriend he will ever have. That goes for you too EXB. I know you are reading this.


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Annoyance 023

I was supposed to be looking for the sweet spots in life this month. Pffftt! To hell with that ... would you just look at this!



Me: Ummm ... hello. Hello? HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

A small internal voice: Hey goofball, you know you're the ONLY one here, right?

Me: Shut up, and get me some toilet paper.


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Newsflash

My ex ex boyfriend (NOT to be confused with my EXB), sent me a text this morning:

Ex ex boyfriend: I think my relationship is over. What is wrong with WOMEN?

Me: The same thing that is wrong with MEN. Sorry.

What's that you say?

Overheard in local department store:

First girl, "I love Target."
Second girl, "Me too, it's like a mini Walmart, but better."
Spoken only as teenage girls can speak.

I don't know why, but that made me laugh. Is anything mini better? I guess mini skirts or dresses could be better for some, but I'm thinking only a few. Speaking of clothes, have you seen your share of muffin tops lately or is that a southern thing? I'm thinking that if girls wanna roll out in those ubber low rise jeans and neon thongs, that they could go mini on the overspill. That would certainly be better.

Mini coopers are supposedly better for the environment, but some are built to blow your doors off, and that can't be good for the environment! However, they would suit my lead foot mighty fine!

Mini mr. Goodbars are definitely better for me, if I don't eat so many that they rival a full sized one ... eeekkkkkkkk .... or GOD FORBID two! I think mini anything in the food world is a disaster waiting to happen. Just because that cookie is a mini doesn't mean you can eat twenty of them. I tend to be an "all or nothing" sort of person, that's why a bag of anything "mini" isn't allowed to come home with me. Never, and I mean never underestimate the power of the mini ...

Come to think of it, most of my blogs are "mini." That's why I sign off as Lickety Splitter. There are days I will roll out with something that doesn't fit the mini category, but overall, I have bursts of non genius thoughts which I like to share with someone whom I love, but is no longer part of my everyday life. Blog followers, meet my ex boyfriend (aka "my EXB") and your fellow follower ... Paraic.


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Simple Pleasure 005

Every traffic light between here and the mall giving me a "GO" during my lunch hour, that's sweeeeeeettttt.


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Come one, come all ...

Step right up! I have something to show you! That's right, ladies and gentlemen, it's 2010. Isn't she a beaut? She's full of spirit, promise, sass, love, wit, hope, joy, kick ass attitude, and a thousand more wonders which she will double for any trouble. Maybe you can't have it all at one time, or maybe you can. It's really all up to you and me! Give her what she needs and take your needy share. Coax from her all that you want and try your best to give it all back. I want it all and nothing at the same time.

What about you? Yeah you, just you. Do you want out, do you want in? Are you living large, or delectably small? Is your cloud making your favorite shape? Did the leprechaun lead you to shillings worth their weight in love? Are those green eyes wicking away tears of joy, are they gleaming like the Irish fields they were born to roam? What's your worry, why hurry? Take your dragon, head west, looking back east, using north as your guide, but remember, heart finds its greatest shelter in south. Don't let its stare catch you by surprise, embrace the benign breeze and savor those silky particles which pushed, shoved, all out roughhoused their way across the Gulf Stream to caress you.



This guy is my new compadre. His name is Eli. Yes, I know he isn't real to you, but he is very real to me. He and I are passionate about one another. He has a twin brother who went west.

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Annoyance 022

The words: "New and Improved." They are nothing short of fighting words!

I will best you yet I-POD Nano! I'm no tech novice. You are simply being childishly resistant to my earphones. Do you think you are so special that replacement earphones aren't good enough for you?



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Simple Pleasure 004

Jack Johnson's song, Bubble Toes, especially these lyrics:

...
When you move like a jellyfish
Rhythm don't mean nothing
You go with the flow
You don't stop
Move like a jellyfish
Rhythm is nothing
You go with the flow
You don't stop

...
If you would only listen
You might just realize what you're missing
You're missing me
If you would only listen
You might just realize what you're missing
You're missing me


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Simple Pleasure 003

Simple pleasure of the day:

My 1929 house has really good karma! It's a feel good, welcoming, come on in and put your feet up sort of house! So, I am taking a simple pleasure in the fact that my house doesn't have a bad vibe!

Call me ridiculous for this simple pleasure, but I would first ask you to watch the classic Amityville Horror, be chased around by Casper's less than friendly relatives, or watch about three epidodes of Paranormal State on A & E and then tell me this is a silly simple pleasure. I can go to sleep each and every night in sweet peace, and I call that a simple pleasure especially considering the alternatives!


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Simple Pleasure 002

Like most people, I love humor. I really enjoy silly, sarcastic, cynical, intellectually witty and dry humor. I pursue witty! I love witty like children love play.

Simple pleasure of the day -- humor contributed to Reader's Digest by Sally Phillips. Wanna hear it? Of course you do!


On a nighttime visit to his brother's base, my son Joe was impressed by the large airplane hangar in which Bill worked. But when Billy led him through another door, Joe was absolutely astounded by the massive, darkened room.

"This is the largest building I've ever been in!" he said. "What do you call it?"

His brother answered, "The outside."



(I just didn't see that coming people, and it totally made me laugh out loud.)


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Simple Pleasure 001

Since I give so much time to wailing my annoyances on here, I thought I should balance the scales and share my simple pleasures as well:

Simple pleasure of the day:

Looking for motivation to do an extra 15 minutes on the elliptical trainer? Get lucky like I did this morning, and have inspiration perch itself in front of you on the stationary bike. I fell in love with the back of inspiration's neck (kissie kissie). The rest of him wasn't bad either ;)



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