Anybody got a rope?

Is there any room on this blank page for me?  Yeah, its me, the virtual stranger, who once felt as if I practically owned this box.  I feel blah.  Less than blah with no compulsion to write.  Hopefully this feeling will come and go.  In the meantime, Nikki was right, I've been lost in book world.  I have been reading and also listening to more of those infernal audio books.  I have been keeping company with Ernest Hemingway, Deepak Chopra, Daniel Pink, Jane Green, Ernest Gaines, Anne Lamont, Lee Childs and some cat who lured me in with the promise a more interesting me.  Spurred by my insatiable quest towards any type of personal growth, and the fact that I spend most of my work days in my own company, I figured I better step up my game, because I've been bored lately.  After trying to listen to DeBono's audio book "How You Can Be More Interesting," I realized I was already more interesting than his book ever hoped to be, so I was already ahead of his game.  So as not to throw Mr. DeBono under the big yellow bus, I understand his book on Creativity, is a better read. 

My favorite audio books were definitely the Lee Child "Jack Reacher" novel, and a novel by Ernest Gaines, entitled "A Lesson Before Dying." The Gaines novel deals mainly with racism which is a familiar topic for anyone who lives in the deep south, but I could also relate to the main character's angst when he said ...


"but I had been running in place ever since. Unable to accept what used to be my life, unable to leave it."

Wow, a zinger!  If ever a line of literature was going to sear itself into my brain, it was guaranteed to be that one line. Grant's internal angst is the story of my mid life crisis.  Taffy pulling angst.  How do you give up what you love and everything you know, for something you long for, but isn't a guarantee to greater happiness?   

As for the Reacher novel ... be still my heart ... literally.  I had to push the stop button when things got too intense.  I loved all the action, but it definitely elevated my fight or flight instinct, which in turn elevated the heart rate.  Santa and I need to have a talk.  I want my very own Jack Reacher for Christmas!  However, I want my Jack Reacher to have a sexier voice than the one the audio book world gave him.

Speaking of those audio books, I have another bone to pick with them.  My eyes are mad.  They aren't used to taking a back seat to my ears.  My eyes keep focusing on something mentally distracting while I am trying to listen to the book.  Can you imagine how annoying that is to my hearing?  I didn't realize how much I enjoyed using my eyes while reading.  I don't think this would be an issue if I were DRIVING while listening to the audio books (insteading of working), because I listened to hours of Radiolab podcasts to and from the beach last week, and that experience was nothing but pure joy.  Unfortunately, I haven't found any other task besides driving that I can fully engage in while simultaneously immersing myself in the audio world.  But hey, that doesn't stop me from trying.  So what if I have to repeat a chapter or two or three or four.  It's better than pickling my brain in its own brine.
 
As for the rope, no worries, I wasn't about to hang anyone or myself, I just want to pull myself out of the blahs.


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